Resiliency & Me
Finding Strength Through Your Journey
Unlimited access to Support Resources i.e Printables, Support Tips, Topic Discussions, Motivational Stories, Helpful Articles & much more!
Depression | How to Support Someone Through It
April 26th, 2020
“ If you know someone who’s depressed, please resolve never to ask them why. Depression isn’t a straightforward response to a bad situation; depression just is, like the weather. “If you know someone who’s depressed, please resolve never to ask them why. Depression isn’t a straightforward response to a bad situation; depression just is, like the weather. Try to understand the blackness, lethargy, hopelessness, and loneliness they’re going through. Be there for them when they come through the other side. It’s hard to be a friend to someone who’s depressed, but it is one of the kindest, noblest, and best things you will ever do .” - Stephen Fry
If you know someone is struggling with depression, you may feel confused, frustrated and distraught yourself. Maybe you feel like you’re walking on eggshells because you’re afraid of upsetting them even more. Or maybe you keep giving your loved one advice, which they just aren’t taking. We have to recognize that supporting someone with depression does not mean fixing their problems. A person with depression often needs treatment to see improvement — and that’s something only a medical professional can provide. What you can do is support them through this challenging time.
We have had a lot of parents reach out during this time of quarantine asking our tips on how to support their child, youth and loved one who are showing signs of depression. Here are some of our suggestions;
Signs of Depression To Look Out For:
- They have a hopeless outlook on life
- They have an increase in fatigue and sleep problems
- Symptoms of Anxiety
- They have lost interest in things they love
- Signs of Irritability
- Uncontrollable Emotions
- Appetite or Weight Changes
- Finding it hard to concentrate
- Suicidal Ideation Urges or Attempts
How You Can Support:
Put yourself in the person's shoes in a nonjudgmental way. Think about how you would feel if you were coping with symptoms of depression and how you would want people to react. Maintain eye contact when listening, and say things like, “That sounds hard. I’m sorry you are going through this,” and “I’m always here for you.”
By responding to your person in an open and empathetic way, you show them that they aren’t a burden.
Communication is Key
To do this, practice using “I” statements. “Begin sentences with, ‘I’m worried,’ ‘I’m concerned’ or ‘I’ve noticed.’ Then explain your concerns to your person” he suggests. “Avoid saying, ‘You don’t seem like yourself,’ or ‘You haven’t been hanging out as much as you usually do.’ They can create defensiveness in the person receiving the message.”
There is no quick fix for depression. The recovery process takes time. You’re less likely to get frustrated with, or give up on, your person if you’re hunkered down for the long haul.
What Not To Do:
Don’t: Think you can fix it
Recognize that supporting your loved one does not mean fixing their problems. Anyone battling with depression often needs treatment to see improvement — and that’s something only a medical professional can provide.
Don’t: Give up
But what if your person rejects your efforts even when you’ve done all the right things? Their rejection may be a defense mechanism. They realize you’re recognizing their symptoms and that they’re not doing as good a job hiding them as they thought, It’s easy to react negatively to a friend who’s unwilling to get help. But stick with them and maintain communication. Continue to check in on your person and encourage them to get help.
Even with the best of intentions, sometimes it's hard to know what to say to someone coping with depression. Here are some common phrases people still use, and what we suggest you should say instead;
“Snap out of it”
Try instead: How can I help you?
“You’ve got nothing to be depressed about”
Try instead: I’m sorry you’re struggling, let me help.
“Aren’t you being a bit dramatic?”
Try Instead: I didn’t realize, you can talk to me now.
“It’s just in your head”
Try Instead: Together we’ll get through this – I’ve got your back.
Try Instead: I know you’re strong enough to get through this.
“You don’t look sick”
Try Instead: Let’s hang out, when you feel ready.
“Maybe you just need to make some changes”
Try Instead: You are not alone, I’m here for you.
“You’re being a bit selfish”
Try Instead: I don’t like seeing you like this, I want to help.
“You’re being ungrateful”
Try Instead: Let’s focus on the positive together.
What to do if you know someone is experiencing Suicidal Ideation:
If you are concerned that someone may be harming themselves, don’t dismiss your gut.
- Pay attention to anything said about suicide, other forms of self-harm or a world that doesn’t include them.
- Keep the lines of communication open so they know they can talk to you when they have these feelings.
- Encourage them to get professional help.
If you think someone is in immediate danger, call 911 or take them to the nearest emergency department.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
Please remember, the person you are supporting their situation is not hopeless.
Like other challenges, depression can be treated with the right medical help and the support of friends like you.
Rock Bottom; Light After Darkness
April 14th, 2020
The thing about life is it's not always easy, and you can't always win.
At some point of your life, it hits you. It hits you really really hard. , you lose a family member, friend or relationship, you lose a job, your home. At some point in your life, you're gonna hit rock bottom. You're paralyzed, you're like, "Why?" and that "Why" can really destroy you. Once you start asking yourself, "Why me? Why not the others, why me? I'm actually a good person, I've never done anything significantly bad, why is this happening to me?". Its because that's life.
Life is unfair. Success is not measured on the days when the sun shines. Success is measured on the dark, stormy, cloudy days and if you cannot absorb failure, you're never gonna meet success.
Sometimes it takes things in your life to fall apart, in order for better things to fall into place. Sometimes it takes the most uncomfortable path, to lead your life to the most beautiful place. There's gonna be bad days, there's gonna be dark days, but you've gotta embrace it. Because that pain is what makes you stronger. Failure is what makes you stronger. You have to accept those down times, because once you realize those down times, are just as much part of life as anything else, you're able to strive again. You'll never see the purpose of the storm, until you see the growth it produced. You'll never understand why you went through what you went through, until you see the strength, the power, the resilience that it built inside of you. Ask yourself, why But this why is a better why, "Why am I doing this? Why am I failing? Why am I even getting myself in a situation where I could fail? Because I have a dream. Because I have goals." The more you're thinking back to those original goals, the easier it is for you to get back up and say, "Alright, it might be difficult, it might be painful, it might be stressful, there might be no people that believe in me, but I believe in myself." You know it might have been the case that you should have gone through that harsh break up, that you should have gone through that heavy loss, just in order to find something even better. But the only way to get to that even better, is to get back up and work. To get back up and put yourself out there again, arise from that again, stronger, better, smarter, ready to grasp that new opportunity. You gotta believe the tables in your life will turn. That pain will become power, that weakness will become strength, and that confusion will become peace. Better things are coming for your life. Everyday is a new beginning. It's time for you to start treating it that way.
Quarantined and Bored? Beat the Boredom!
April 2st, 2020
If social distancing has you stuck inside going stir crazy, here are several activities you can do with your children/youth or even with yourself to pass the time and keep grounded. We have put together a list of activities to help keep busy through this period of Quarantine. These activities are universal and we hope you find them enjoyable and beneficial!
Rediscover Your Inner Artist!
There has been an online trend of people re creating classic iconic artworks at home! Channel your inner Picasso and Monet and recreate some of your favorites! You don't even need the most expensive oil paints and canvas you can use your durable printer paper and any markers or pencil crayons you have laying around your house. It is also a great educational activity for children and youth to learn about some of our worlds famous artists.
Take Dance Classes at Home!
There are many accessible tutorials available on youtube especially Dance Lessons! Dancing is such a fun way to keep yourself active indoors and it is a universal activity! All ages will enjoy this! There is such a wide variety of dance categories to fit all preferences!
Here Are Some Of Our Favourite Recommendations;
7 Rings Beginners Dance Tutorial
Iconic Tik Tok Dances Tutorial
3 Simple Dance Moves for Beginners
Learn How To Play An Instrument Or
Practice The One You Already Know How To Play
Music has been proven to be extremely therapeutic, whether that be listening to your favorite artist/band or creating your own music. There are so many instrumental tutorials that are available online for all instruments. We have an abundance amount of time available right now, why not develop a new skill that you can utilize and impress your friends and family once our period of self isolation is over? If you already have the knowledge to play an instrument, and have procrastinated picking it up again, now is the time to discover your skill! Maybe teach someone who is willing to learn!
Letters are a lost art form and should be re introduced. Everyone loves to receive a hand written card, but very few actually invest time into writing one. Since digital communication is so accessible the lost form of hand written letters have taken a major back seat. But what a letter has that digital communication doesn't have is the warmth personal touch of a letter. They can be re read, they also take a lot of effort that the receiver will recognize and acknowledge. In addition, they are extremely inexpensive. Our CYCP's believe children and youth of this generation should experience another way of communication!
Don't forget to take hand sanitizer to the mailbox.
This Is Your Time; Do Not Take It For Granted
April 1st, 2020
In challenging times like these. we must shift our mindset.
At this very moment we understand everyone feels unsure, anxious.. but we need to strengthen our mind and utilize this abundance amount of time effectively. At some point, these uncertain times will be over! We must all keep reminding ourselves that! But, until that day comes we must all effectively use our time in the most beneficial way possible. Whether that be reading, enhancing your knowledge by learning, exercise, strengthening our relationships and friends etc.
We also CAN and SHOULD be using this time to reflect on where we are and where we are going.
Remember, Our world is on pause at this very moment.
Take advantage of this gift of time and do not take it for granted.
These challenging times right now are a blessing in disguise and when we emerge from this, your most resilient self will emerge also.
You Will Grow Through What You Go Through
March 20th, 2020
When you are faced with any life challenge you should allow the experience to help you evolve. Allow it to change you, and shape your character. Challenging circumstances are never fun to go through, in fact, nobody enjoys going through a storm. But remember, the key is that you are going through, meaning you will come out on the other side as a changed person.
Our most painful storms can turn into our greatest victories! Its these very situations and moments that can change our lives forever...
Our Top Rated Inspirational Motivation Videos Recommendations
Grow Through It
Push Through The Pain
Recycle Your Pain
"Pain is temporary. Quitting lasts forever." - Lance Armstrong
Home Based Therapeutic Art Projects
March 20th, 2020
Research has shown that art therapy has been used quite successfully to help children learn to effectively communicate, have improved concentration, improved behaviors and develop closer relationships. It has shown to improve moods, promote relaxation, and decrease disruptive behaviors and attitudes. “Randomised controlled trial research shows that art therapy helped improve coping strategies.” (Penny Brohn Cancer Care, 2011, Online)
Therapeutic art projects to do at home with your Child and Youth of all ages!
Duel Self Portrait
What to Let go vs. What to Reach for?
Emotions Wheel / Tree of Strengths / I Am Collage
The Healing Power of Art; Benefits
March 20th, 2020
“Art washes from the soul the dust of everyday life.” ~ Pablo Picasso
Why do we love Art? It's a healthy therapeutic outlet. Through art, many children and youth are able to express feelings and experiences that they’re unable to put in to words. This is especially important when dealing with a tragic event or a stressful and challenging time in your life.
Welcome to our Resource Content Page
March 28th, 2020
Our resident Child and Youth Care Practitioners have created a specialized Resourceful Content page to help support all families globally. We want all families to be able to have accessible support content!
Our Content Page will have supportive resources for your child and youth, access to resourceful articles, purposeful activity printables, motivational stories and so much more! If you have any suggestions on additional resources or topics you would like us to cover, please feel free to email us below! We will love to hear from you!